Mary and me, Part 13

In or out?

I do not mind if none of this will be published. By writing I have had some clearer thoughts and it has been really good company for me. Some of my friends have liked these texts too. I do not know if it is because they know me and that they almost every time have some interest in what I do. Sometimes writing is good, other time not so good. I think this is the last one. Starts to sound desperate in a way.

Well, Mr. Melancholy is my friend. In this country I have had a license to be sad. It is easy to get depressed, but difficult to get out of there. I think it is no use to get as crazy as the world around you. But if you do not fit well enough, you are out. Who wants to be in?

An anarchist, Mary said, I am. Does she want me to fit in? If so, I do too. But in my own way. It makes a big difference for me. "Have you ever had a feeling that the world has left you behind? Have you ever had a feeling that the world has left you behind? Have you ever had a feeling that you are losing your mind?", Sting was singing in a movie called Leaving Las Vegas.